Funny Realizations Life's Little Moments Present

Early this week I had someone say something to me that made me incredibly mad. However it also made me realize something as strange as that sounds. It made me realize that people can say whatever they want about you however that does not necassarily make it true. You have the ability to control what you think of yourself. If you look at yourself as a failure then guess what your gonna be a failure because you don't expect more of yourself. I have had some serious issues over the past year that have made me look at myself in a different way. I felt myself going back to a place that I did not ever want to go back to! I don't want to be that sad person, that person who can't put the past in the past, etc so for all of that I am getting rid of the negative in my life. I am worth someone's love just as much as the next person. If someone doesn't feel as if I am worthy well they know where the door is. If someone doesn't feel like I am good enough well there again I can draw them a map of the door and how to get there. But alot of times I believe that some of these are thoughts I put in my own head by making more out of a statement, or picture than there really is. Who knows?? All I know is I am a good person, I love with all of my heart, unfortunately I have began to wear my heart on my sleeve much like my wonderful brother who has a big heart like no one I have ever seen, I try to give as much as I can possibly give, I try hard to be a good person that my mother would be proud of however sometimes I fall short! I try hard to see the best in people because even the best people fail sometimes! I have some of the best friends (some I never would have thought I would call friends...you know who you are!), the best family ( not only my incredible family but my husband's as well), amazing kids, and a good husband that maybe sometimes I give a harder time than he deserves and sometimes I am making up for other times that I didn't necassarily give him a hard time when I needed to...lol. We have been through many ups and downs in the past year but the fact of the matter is I love that man with all of my heart and when given a chance to make it work I will every time! Life has thrown me many curve balls and instead of standing with my feet planted on the ground and catching them head on I act like a girl and close my eyes and let it get the better of me. I have seriously got some changing to do not for anyone but myself. I chased that rabbit to get to this point. Last night I watched my daughter and my step daughter talk about boys with a smile on their face and a glow about them. Oblivious to the tears that they will shed before they meet their handsome prince, the heartache they will feel, the many boyfriends they will have, the feeling of being on cloud 9, etc. It made me realize just how innocent children really are and how life would be so much better if we had never known pain that most kids have no idea exists. If life were like that we could love with no worries, whole heartedly, with no fears of getting hurt, and make the most out of each and every day. I know an innocent crush is a wierd way of coming to this realization however seeing them last night has made me remember days like that being giddy and excited about a boy. The real realization is I should be giddy and excited like that everyday because I have the most amazing gifts God has ever given me...my life and everyone in it!